Have you noticed.. as time passes, we harden?
As in... yeah, we have our own preferences now and less tolerance to deviate from it, so yeah, we are definitely hardened that way - set in our ways and our needs and thoughts. Emotionally too, we are no longer as bubbly, as cheerful, as hopeful or as vulnerable as we used to be. Yeah? Why is that?
Some might say, "Because we’ve been through certain events in life, that were so traumatic that it literally changed us."
What if I said, those events had no power to change who you are? That you allowed it to take control? Would that be too far from the truth?
Allow me to explain with a few examples:
Person A had their heart broken by many people. They tried to be vulnerable many times and each time, opened up their world only to be hurt again.
Person B’s friend or family broke their trust over and over again. They feel betrayed.
Person C lost a family member or a close friend. They lost faith.
So what do they do now? They harden. They close their heart. They no longer smile wistfully thinking of anyone. No longer trust anyone easily. They struggle with having faith.
It is a defense mechanism. Subconsciously we try to protect ourselves and stop being so open, vulnerable or trusting.
But we are capable of one more thing... Resilience.
We can ALWAYS try again.
To everyone that will now ask, “But why should I be the one always trying again?!”
Because, my dear, when you try again, it is for you. Not for them.
When you forgive, it is for you.
When you move on, it is for you.
When you pick up the pieces, it is for you.
That is the survival mechanism. Subconsciously we decide, we are going to keep going. We are stronger than what hurt us.
We just need to dig deeper, peel away the traumatic events and discard them.
Allow our true playful, fun-loving, happy, hopeful self another chance to shine through... that is all it is.
So both these responses are possible. One is taken by someone who has given up. The other is taken by someone who has given up - FOR NOW.
Like everything, this takes practice, it takes time and it takes patience with oneself.
But it can happen.
It will be scary. For years, we hid behind our trauma. Our identity was shaped by our personal demons. And now, when we try to break free, it will be scary... but you know what, It will bring YOU back. And YOU are worth it.
“One of the happiest moments in life is when you find the courage to let go of what you can’t change.”
🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Sweta Shah Sakhpara is a pranic energy therapist and a pranic psychotherapist. She also teaches mindfulness and meditation to kids, adults and families. When she is not doing any of the above, she actively practices being a mindful parent to two kids.
Having learned and practiced pranic healing for ~fifteen years, Sweta has been blessed with the trust of many clients for ailments as simple as a headache to complex ones like Tourette’s syndrome, from depression and anxiety to finding ways to embrace the idea of a new normal with a child being diagnosed on the spectrum. You could read more about her HERE.
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